#30

One More Loud Whistle Blows!
By XII

I came from the midland
To worship where my parents breathed
But they built up towers
Poured the molds with sanctity
I knocked on ivory doors
To build up such young ambition
The wind of change like a fever in my body
Join the people waiting for a needy demolition
The round council table is wooden
With firm patterns across it's surface
I stood finally, reciting from a paper
Swallowed my tongues wondering if it was worth it
They told me to swim great lengths
To reach the spot they had all seen
But I couldn't grab it from the shore
I stayed to hum around the local scene
The firm, fresh bodies of young people
Do not deserve to be all up in chains
I am not afraid of your commanding chariots
On fire, I am waiting for god to make it rain
The movements that all of you can't speak of
Bring joy to the hearts of searching people
I've opened up a great many rule books
But have never been told to climb to the steeple
This whole thing seems like a broken treadmill
Buttons never seem to make it work
As I slam my fists on unyielding plastics
Employees want to paint me as a jerk
As if I came in with a gaudy rifle
To a sensible, level headed gun show
Like I wanna show off how to defy them
Instead of wanting to let normal life flow
Should we really be treated like a prison
Walls that cannot close to hold me in
Am I supposed to shove this in my body
Take it all in with a sick grin
Nobody tells me when to go to heaven
I have been staying up all night
Sweating new rules that I see sometimes
Knowing that no one wants a fight
We all want to stay so plaid-Amish
Pushing oxen over daisies in the field
The night people are the wrong powers
Stop signs will never change to say yield
So I throw up my mad mans hands
Growl into the danger of the night time
Wonder who on Earth thought this up
I wait for something clearer in my sight line

#29

Extra Alive
By XII

Your eyes are like the water I look into
They reflect what I am not afraid to be like
I wonder if they'll hate me just for writing it down
But honestly I don't give two fucks
So I hope no one throws stones like they used to
The table bends and breaks under the weight of justice
Finally served, finally balanced
I am electrically excited to breathe
And the wind whips my hair into flash dance
Nothing noteworthy goes unnoticed
Notify the county sheriff of my intentions to rob everyone
I want to steal the sunshine and hold it down
Rub it on the earth, till' it leaks into the ground
Then take your hands in mine and just
lay down
Straight into the sunshine
Something in the water is contaminating me
I have never felt like I could float on water
This feeling in my body is expanding ever further
Until everyone in the county is affected
The dances that we do will not wake up the dead
But the living will rejoice until the dying come up peacefully
Ready to come around and stop people crying
Please join in and sing the three songs
That everyone is taught right before they are born
These three songs are as follows:
I love you
I need you
"Lean on Me" by Bill Withers

#28

Cactus Kids Club
By XII

Hardly holding on to the lip of the horizon
I struggle in my innertube
The summer is attempting to end, viciously
I have begun to run
I will not let hope die
I will get all of the fun
I have not yet been alive

Autumn is a strange, strange man
Winter will not kill me yet
Spring is a total cocktease
It's impossible not to see where I'm going
Down the river
But the river is a total symbol
of distance and constant flow
My escape will be magnificent
I will explode but not from pressure
The vibrant light not present at night
Is a lifeblood I had not expected

#27

Howdy Stranger
By XII

I am spreading my rivers wide open
To focus and nothing will remain very sacred
The old hilltop crumbles
While sweat buds on Atlas' brow
I am patiently sitting on a mountaintop
Waiting for it all to fall down

Humble eagle struts across the sky
Hovers forever in my eyeline
Peaceful people
Start throwing colored stones
The door swings wide open
So that no one can pretend to know

It's all apart
I can't sit still
Sky is dark
Moon is ill

#26

My Hobbies Include Barn Quilting
By XII

I turn up the stereo
Tear down your shirt
Castles collapsing
On the living room floor
Passionless wars over nameless estates
Brown shag carpet with fragments from
broken plates
There are limitless verandas to stand on
Reciting drawn apathy lines
Swirled in pools of human genesis
Mouthwash, Jar of Vaseline
Plastic cups lined up like traitors
I thought the reds were my friends
"Oh no!" I exclaim
and quickly change the channel
Urkel's funny faces deflate my false bravado
I won't beat up
I won't even get up
Pour me down a hole past the weekend
Lay shallow bricks on my eyes
Pray for some real wishes to come down on us
A feast will be prepared
in our dirty golden hair!

#25

I'll E-Mail It To You Sometime
By XII

Meet me directly on Wabash
I still need one friend
That understands drug culture
Don't bring ten kilos or anything
Look man, I'm only addicted to the fashion
Step back before you examine my motives
September to August on fire
A whole year of chemical dependence
Sweat down my fire escape
I love to sing plastic love songs
Put plates over my ears and hum
I'm getting scared proportional
To how dark it is becoming
How dark is it in the place where you aren't coming from?

#24

That Cat is the Key To It All - Also, It is Darned
By XII

Intro - It's Nice To Meet Other Heathens
I can come down like Cain to swing a wicked chariot
Spitting beer and cigarettes on God's Precious Moments collectibles
The wind carries the messages of all the new wars
I pluck them like chosen grapes, dangling
There is a bright, red pick up truck in Topeka, Kansas
One day it will run me down completely, damn it all
Main - Meet Our Man
(babygirl)(babygirl)
The queen of the town people
Her float, moving galas, invade
My galaxy (or head space)
Leaving a flawed trace
I tried to hold it all in
Jumped right up with the wind
Heard you gasp, saw your scepter
Mostly heard the voice of My Master Deceiver
I laughed right out loud at this
Ran away but first stole a kiss
Kicked out the band leader's shins
But this is not a list of my sins
So let me tell you, the day was clear
It was coming, it was near
Took Compton to the north side
I felt just like the right guy
Reached the building, pulled the door
But nothing happened, got nothing more
My dry tongue is in need of molasses
I fell young, I feel spastic
End - Meet Everything Else
I dug up Abraham
I am a bad man
I dug up Abraham
I ruined God's plan
Breeze rocks me to sleep
Judgment on coasts in the east
Where I dug up the covenant

#23

My Car Got Totaled Off of Interstate 64 and Now My Head Is Bleeding, Can You Help Me?
By XII

Silence is golden
I can look at your hair
Wandering, wondering
cool desert air
in my lungs, not my mouth
Hard oasis water
Crisp, calm breezes
The revolutionary daughter
Marches on
In the dawn
The electric space is my own
Come to Tucson, select a home
Storm clouds come about
Chaplains start to shout
"Drink my body, drink my blood
find the sinner, call the flood
Pick up your bullhorns and your crosses
Convert 10 heads and cut your losses"
At the sound of this march
I head for the border
Any more false starts
And I'll be following orders
The time is ripe to get out of town
Crawl under the wire and roll around
Holy fire and holy shit
How'd us two get caught up in it?
My hair's on fire and your dress is drowning
This is most definitely something I won't be forgetting
Rock and roll with heart and soul (out of my open window)
March on to electric dawn
I'm gonna ramp the whole town some day
Yelling, "I'm afraid now that nothing's in my way!"

#22

Arguably Difficult Business To Conduct On Holiday
By XII

Hard gravy crystallizes on the plate
Chatter with Dr. Morisson has ceased
He seemed flighty and not good enough
Just another literate beard
Molesting our peace of mind

Mom's tight dress brings desert
I hate his chocolate cake fake face
His tie is piss yellow
in my father's chair, father's grave
It is apparent that sacredness is not

The hard gravy cracks slowly
Under the weight of hard, sterling silver
My fork grinds slowly
Towards silent dinner justice
The finale is a loud, scraping sound

#21

I'm Writing A Poem
By XII

The line
breaks don't really
even matter
at all
do they?
Are you going to read this any different if
you have to adjust
your gaze.
It's great
to write
a
poem
when no one you know
wants
to admit things that
need
some serious admitting
Logs burn slowly on the fire and crack in half like people do sometimes
Try harder
Be better
Try harder, Be better, Try harder, Be better
Put it back
together

#18, #19, #20

Jonah in Three Acts
By XII

Jonah: Act I - A Man in the Wilderness

When I go to the grocery store
Do not follow behind me
Lest you are branded a heathen
The men in the tower are always watching us
My yew bow is bent, broke, out of all arrows
I want their eyes off of me in an immediate way
Too many friends have gone gutter diving for pearls of wisdom
If I bake a cake, no one make a metaphor
Help me hurry last chances out of the door and into
the Volkswagen waiting on the street
Motor filled with cigarette ash and the blood of wicked men
At the grocery store they asked for my ID
I ran into the street crying, got a bloody knee
All of the furniture in my house was gone
When I crawled in my front door
-
Jonah: Act II - Finding My Own Home Again

I caught you like a lucky break on a Saskatchewan side road
You were falling out of an oppressive-Ford (Model T, green)
I laughed at your scrapes and you cried a little
Told you I was from a time and place that no one wanted
I love seesaws and coarse language with you (all of us)
At the Canadian border I thought to not cry at all
Then you came along like a rolling prophet, saving my soul
Hope that I never die in a fire, like I love the medicine
Your tongue knows stories about Mayan ruins
It told them to me in sequences and Shakespearean asides
;My hair shakes in the fall when I understand peace and
want to write a thesis on your back
I can work a little every night, build a wall, girl
Meet at Stonehenge but don't laugh when I tell you why I'm terrified
Dominated by the winds of change again
Our presence in that town carved a river (a Grand Canyon)

Jonah: Act III - In The Woods, Make An Echo

I am tired and also writing a novel-novella?
Dear book stores of the world, buy me to assist your business
Mountainous beard on my face, grass brown like wheat
Made to go home again like shutting down a fountain
The tower men, goddamn, what is their deal?
Carry my banjo down to the tree line, make a noise to make a way
I'll shimmy out the bathroom window
Packed some extra underwear, tight around my harmonica
Told the people that I don't carry a single cent
Don't care to mention how my time was served
In jail again, cups on top of a pile of my belongings
I hurt daily, trapped in town
Nothing worked like a map of the suburbs did
Can you hold the tower door open?
I am ready to walk on broken bricks (wait for my signal)

#17

Honor + Asshole
By XII

Dry teeth hurt me tongue bad
Island drown in shark language
No known man steps soft
Let down my basket harshly
Hurriedly shushing seven headed children
Golden seals flash in nudism
Flying solo hurts fuel supply
Real stretchy hurt men
Cry into dark paper bags
Breathing like Amadeus briefly
Eyes on you or me or our family
Keep out of the trashcan
Can Jesus do the can-can?
Please pleases Pleaser Caesar
Bow down in downtown at high noon
Pick pistols from the pinkness
She wouldn't dare hug my teddy collection
Hurt me like a hurricane
Puke downstream is green clear
Gloves, shovel, bright purple
I love dancing over to you and punching
Hallow alleycat draws near
Halo placed in dictionaries before hello
Longitude is like latitude is like love
Coffee breaks my stupid hearts
Let's all hurt in a circle!
Cry in a bucket!
Weep in a forum!
I HATE MY DAD
My alcohol problems are everyone's fault
Fuck I hate your faces
Go back where you came
Break open your gift bag
Surprise!
I got you two good eyeballs
Some wordplay for the work day
and a shitty little Furby
told me that he loved me
I left him in the Puget Sound
But he would not fucking drown
Am I awake or sleeping?
Is my pager beeping?
I've got two more days
I am always solitary afraid
Soldiers on soldiers shouting my name
I wish I had a coma dream state
Stop the thinking, press releases
Every damn person wishes I had Jesus
Never touched the byline copy
Won't admit till I know they've caught me
and I said
Quoting movies is a substance
Snorting popularity is social justice
Rocks in my Cocoa pebbles
Fuck your shitty CDs
I won't listen to all but not me
Or anyone without headphones
Playing around hot plates
I think my shy breakdown is late
Colossal nothing ever ends
or goes over the fence
Spinning gross shit around the sink
Get someone to scrape it out
Hold it up, write it down

#16

The Dream of Granite Steps
By XII

Touching on the subway
I love city night lights
I search empty dumpsters
and lift up trash can lids
like searching neon lit dance havens
For any sort of hoodrat partner
to take to Chez Expensive
back to my apartment
let's ride the subway
Halfway there I lurch forward
Apologize and lock lips
Tearing at city clothes
to be one with grime and light
I leave them all
at the Williams St. stop
I can't ever get the city girl smell
out of my hair

#15

My Kitty is Sick With Hairballs
By XII

The glass hall bebop is a brand new dance
You do it at night; all by yourself
Take one heart and one head
Mix it all together until something leaks out
Follow those instructions implicitly
Never stray from the quickly lit path
Shaken and unsure, arrive at your home
The place you built in hills of flesh
When you realize that the whole thing is on rails
Don't forget her telephone number
Pick up a rotary phone and have no second thoughts
Toss bricks into rocking Camaros
See what happens in the other hemisphere
Get a black eye underneath a new sky
What does everybody think of this guy
Breaking mirror and handing it to friends
Neon lights illuminate young faces
Offered lemonade is stuck up noses
Sidewalks turn to moving pathways
No one understands your languages
People from the stereo talk just like you
Bright red and always somehow dead tired
Gnawing at the edge of every hanging string
Checking lotto numbers with everyone around
Feverishly calculating odds of going big
Waiting in the outfield for a grand party
Infield yells for you to come toward the light
Clawing at choices that remain inevitable
Beating at a self-built brick wall
Trickling down clues to secret services
Receiving coded messages that may be grocery lists
You nod your head and turn out the light
Punch your stomach, hug goodbye

#14

Twas Brillig
By XII

I'm tired
But I'm writing you a letter
Something substantial
To dance outright
I'm almost done
The water in my nostrils
Is a very simple stop sign
Backlogged into vodka
Puking onto journals
Mud monsters are on me
Pulling down my overalls
Whispers in my ears
Like the choir is my fear
Drink another beer
Repeating hymns to Dionysus
I hope no one ever finds us

#13

From the Desk of Dr. Pope
By XII

Don't look at selfish pentagrams
Don't eat on Shabbath
Don't touch your private parts
for thirty days
Don't wear white to Sunday School
Don't hold your breath
Don't just hate conditionally
Don't mention your sources
Don't hold me to this
Don't forget to read yr verses
Don't open yr mouth
Don't keep yr eyeballs
Don't shear the sheep
Don't touch the fence
Don't drink too much flesh and blood
Don't hold up the white flag
Don't talk to outsiders

#12

Sang One Song
By XII

Slowly, deliberately I opened the door
Wandered into my favorite store
She was behind the counter
Glowing like a street lamp
Put in by some workers
Half past their dimes
Stepped into half-light
These were innocent times
Checked my watch in one corner
Pretended that I knew the owner
Holding on to an opaque glass
I couldn't ask what I wanted to ask
Fell down the wheelchair ramp
into the dull, dim, dusty, dirty street
In my mouth, the taste of orange peels
The grim grim taste of defeat

#11

Hot Red Faced
by XII

Doctors want me to cool it
I will win the race
Strum the banjo
Break the tape
You are not an obstacle
But you are not a friend
Did you even care to call
I ain't gonna answer
You are not my mother
Never listened either
Something had to break
Pull us both down too
All around a tempest thing
Quieter, no padded shoes
Coming home to someone
I lost it down the drain
Hold the tempo/break the choir

#10

Bum Reputations
By XII

Someone call the infantry
To help me through my infancy
All these hurts on mah body
Are never very realistic
Did I cause it at all
Why do I even ask
Can't I just go to sleep
Slowly breathing meek
Are you alright
Are you OK
Who is having our good days
Is it a close friend
No one knows or ever cares
About your common love affairs
So if you keep stressing the throne
You end up even more alone

#9

Very Awkward and Very Terrible Feeling
By XII

I honestly cannot believe
What happened in the trees
Tension with no passion
Low grade migraine
almost passed out
Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse
Never, ever spend a cent
Hold it all like a washcloth
Wringing dry hands
Jump the stove or
Stay in your bed or
Actually find the middle ground
Spur horses to run down the Pope's office
if you want to burn it all down
I honestly don't demand
That you go where you can't stand
Kiss the Girl
Someone says:
What is this here in the closet
You have everything you need
You must stop crawling around
with your petty, unmentionable greed
The response that we came up with
sounded like a raw deal
It rubbed everyone
clean as the sun
Aren't we all the fortunate ones
Smiling sisters and brothers
No one talks about everything
Anything that moves or breathes
Walls are collapsing
I should not be laughing
But I've built them back before
Kiss the Girl

#8

Town Hall Meeting Lemonade
By XII

When I came in
The windows were busted out
Your really stupid child was
outright bawling
I actually wanted to smack him
No I don't want the Mary Tyler Moore boxset
How dare you suggest that
I don't love your brother
The foil on my lips
I felt static in my hips
Magnets pulled together for
ten odd yrs
Nothing in the sky darkens
like your attitude
I wish I had said something
Then you wouldn't be so angry
Hey, I'm on fire
On a string of burning liars
Geese gone south
know you want to go with 'em
Well just don't go
Or don't try to take me too
Don't make me say it
No one will go with you
Won't jump the cliffs
Just to make the motions
I have dreams that you are
dashed upon the rocks

#7

Watching Out
By XII

When I came to the American South
I took my careful look around
At the blue bird pocket jacket
that hurts my sanctioned hands
Tread soft on the rocks that
break soft in the bay
The noises they made
They almost drove me insane
Nobody, nowhere can quantify this
A desolate coastline lipping our kiss
Large stakes driven into larger holes
Rattling around to find a place to settle
leaning on an opposite embankment
Tom Sawyer has a hickey and he's
looking rather sickly
But the ice caps melted
Mississippi flooded
seek shelter

#6 (Actually Written Yesterday)

Charles Dexter Ward
By XII

I ain't got a space that's mine
I just jump along the tracks
Who's the hokey brokey mayor?
I need to talk to St. Sobriety
at the center for shock treatment
I need nipple clamps pushed
up under my godawful toenails
bleeding like a stuck virgin
Huffing up and down the stairs
Stands in a real cold corner
The street signs hate the happy
To make the worst decisions
of my entire human life is
like catching on fire and
feeling so warm for a whole
night and in the morning
well, at least you made it through the night

#5

Tokyo Cop Sounds
By XII

Through the speaker wires
I came alive
Went to the slim downed docks
Hasty in heat just yet
Not that no one arrived
on time
The worst players among us
Will rise up like a fetid tide
And the sample of soulful music
Seeks to elucidate my pride
Bright bright disco light
Nuanced nothings slink around
On the boats to upper town
Drank a gallon of paint
Searching for lead
To sink to the bottom
Commune with the dead

#4

Cancel Council
By XII

You say you stand
By your man
With a palm
From an open hand
No one tells me
Who laughs the most
I am the hurricanes
Whinging down to little Surrey
To say: "How do you do?"
We can be driving nowhere
And hit love landmines
Tripping into something
That smells like a discovery
It humbles us and we see
The fingertips clutch onto
Real hope in real people's lives

#3

Cleaved Wally in Twain
By XII

Hoopla'ed the circus freaks
All the warning streaks
Held the limp wrist peeps
On my shallow breast
Lifeboat citizenry clamors
not enough to please
the Caesars and their
hierarchies of any of the
chickpea pleas on the Nile
Who sits there in denial
On the coffee can throne
Slinging mud like family jewels
And the ripe men ponder
The woods are dumb motherfuckers
Everybody knows the old terms
Leave it to Beaver and the
fucking police state

#2

Hanging On A Tolerable Phone Line
by XII

Bright blue dawn on the
Super speed lawn
Stuffing meth mouth
Howdy preacher teacher
Darling I need
you to hate me
Some spark of justice
Dust of policy
Stuck in the mouth
of larger cotton diplomacy
Out loud!: I am okay
Downtown... Uptown no way
In a bright blue bomber
Some singer kicked her heels up
Sang a little ditty
About heading South of the Border

#1

Cat Plans
by XII

I'm gonna hurt you
Keep pressing on my buttons
I hold on too closer
I'm gonna hurt ya
Live on the rock slide
Live like a rebellion
The totally tame kids
Hate the no-stare look around
I am going to diminish
But I will never hurt you
I'm going to camel-back it
Do not worry Charlet, An
The whind whips easy
Like a soft lift can hurt
Every morning aches